Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
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