just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
Randomize
