Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Randomize
