You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
They had half off shots during the fourth quarter. I was powerless.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
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