You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
its liver damage thursday
I'm really busy with my period
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