If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
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DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
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EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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