their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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