Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
We are doing handstands and somersaults in the pool. With an inflatable beer pong table and our regular beer pong table. We're ponging by land and by sea
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
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