oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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