8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I woke up with a russian doll attached to my necklace and a post-it note with "keep babushka safe" written on it. Fuck vodka
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
In her defense, she didn't know I had a twin brother. Plus, we're even: I banged her sister.
Randomize
