i think my tv is drunk
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
Gameplan: If the cops show up, find a potted plant to hide behind... It's worked before!
Randomize
