This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I went to pick my brother up downtown and I stopped at a red light a homeless old man comes up knocks on the window shows me his penis and then screams money
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
