this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
