Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
