why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize