You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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