Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
