ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Randomize
