umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
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