Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
You can call me ugly and you can call me fat,but don't you EVER say my meme game is weak.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize
