SEEEEXXX PLEASE
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
