you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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