Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
