the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
two words...techno handjob
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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