I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I swear to Christ if it turns out to be an intervention, i will set you on fire.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
