I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
I got my little bro high for the first time... Turns out the two of us stoned together is a mess. We spent 10 minutes trying to communicate with each other using just our eyebrows.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
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