you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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