Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i need some magic done to my vagina
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize