did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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