i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
