Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
Randomize
