We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
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