is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
