Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize