woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
I swear she lies about being allergic to gluten so she'll get all the jack and not have to drink shitty beer like the rest of us
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
If I make it through this whole bridesmaid process without anyone knowing that I actually hate everyone but the bride, including the groom, I deserve a complimentary bottle of vodka.
Randomize
