It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
She tied me up with her honor cords...
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
