Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
I just accidentally handed the ticket lady a condom instead of the intended ticket. I am now the official whore of Harry Potter.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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