tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
