This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
if only i could text you this smell
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
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