benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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