I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
