Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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