He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
apparently I kept yelling at her that I wanted t-Rex sized lines. awesome
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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