I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
