He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i am way too old to be getting fingered at work
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
Randomize
