My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Randomize
