Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
The only thing stopping me from having sex with you in my parents jacuzzi bathtub is the knowledge that they've already had that idea themselves
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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