What did we do last night that was yellow?
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Surefire way to sober up: discover that your car is being towed at 2 am.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
