I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
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That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
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I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
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