I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
